töm
07-20-2005, 03:04 PM
As you have already most certainly heard from your news ticker, President George "Nacho President" Bush has nominated Judge John G. Roberts, Jr. to the Supreme Court of the United States of America. You might be thinking. "Well, gawlly, what can this boy do for me?" Well, I don't know. But the internet has appeared to me in an opium-induced vision, and given unto me this information.
John G. Roberts, Jr. was not only the captain of his football team in highschool, but he also studied six years of Latin. (Which basically makes you a doctor or a judge off the bat--your choice. At least that's what Molière says. Oh, Molière, you rascal!!) John G. Roberts, Jr.'s father was an executive for a steel company, and through this his upbringing was quite the affluent and blessèd one. John G. Roberts, Jr. gradated <i>pretty damn good cum laude</i> from both Harvard College and Harvard Law School.
John G. Roberts, Jr. once served as a clerk to Justice Rehnquist of the Supreme Court. He was also special assistant to U.S. Attorney General William French Smith under President Reagan. He was pretty good at arguing in front of the Supreme Court and won most of his cases.
Uhm. Right now he's on the United States Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit.
But anyway. That's a long and glorious career and he should be proud of himself.
But what does he like and what does he not like?
<big>John G. Robers, Jr. hates your rights, the rights of toads, and the rights of mountain tops.</big>
I'm just going to copy and paste now because I don't want my own opinions to muddle this. Voila:
***Roberts was the lead council in Lujan v. National Wildlife Federation. The government's position in this case was that private citizens could not sue the government over violations of environmental regulations. While in private practice, Roberts filed an amicus brief arguing for the allowance of "mountaintop removal" for coal mining in West Virginia.
***Roberts wrote a dissenting opinion in Rancho Viejo, LLC v. Gale A. Norton siding with a developer in a case involving the protection of a rare Californian toad under the Endangered Species Act. He argued that the interstate commerce clause of the Constitution did not permit the government to regulate activity affecting what he called "a hapless toad" that "for reasons of its own lives its entire life in California."
***Roberts favors religion in schools, co-writing an amicus brief to the Supreme Court in which he argued that religious ceremonies should be allowed during high school graduations.
***Roberts was part of the effort to remove certain parts of the Voting Rights Act and then prevent legislation against the Supreme Court's decision about the issue.
***Roberts represented Toyota Motor Manufacturing in a case regarding the Americans with Disabilities Act, in which Toyota argues that carpal tunnel syndrome does not make an employee disabled.
***Roberts defended the validity of a government regulation that banned the mentioning of abortion as an option available to pregnant women seeking help from federally-funded family planning programs:
"We continue to believe that [Roe v. Wade] was wrongly decided and should be overruled."
<b>HOWEVER</b>
In 2003, during his confirmation hearing for appointment to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit, Roberts responded to a senator's question about Roe v. Wade: "<b>Roe v. Wade is the settled law of the land...There is nothing in my personal views that would prevent me from fully and faithfully applying that precedent</b>." He said that his previous statement in 1990 was his client's position, not his own.
***Roberts joined the majority in upholding military tribunals set up by the Bush administration for trying terrorism suspects, overturning the district court ruling.
***The D.C. Circuit case Hedgepeth v. Washington Metro Authority involved a twelve-year-old girl who was invited to incriminate herself as an illegal drug user, taken into custody, handcuffed, driven to police headquarters and booked (fingerprinted) because she ate a french fry in a Washington metro station. Roberts wrote for a 3-0 panel affirming a district court decision that dismissed the girl's complaint. (NOTE FROM TOM: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL THIS ONE MEANS.
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Conclusion? Skip the Supreme Court; Judge John G. Roberts, Jr. for president!
Comments? Comment now. If you were a senator, what would YOU do?! Come one. Let's do some Senatorial RP!!
John G. Roberts, Jr. was not only the captain of his football team in highschool, but he also studied six years of Latin. (Which basically makes you a doctor or a judge off the bat--your choice. At least that's what Molière says. Oh, Molière, you rascal!!) John G. Roberts, Jr.'s father was an executive for a steel company, and through this his upbringing was quite the affluent and blessèd one. John G. Roberts, Jr. gradated <i>pretty damn good cum laude</i> from both Harvard College and Harvard Law School.
John G. Roberts, Jr. once served as a clerk to Justice Rehnquist of the Supreme Court. He was also special assistant to U.S. Attorney General William French Smith under President Reagan. He was pretty good at arguing in front of the Supreme Court and won most of his cases.
Uhm. Right now he's on the United States Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit.
But anyway. That's a long and glorious career and he should be proud of himself.
But what does he like and what does he not like?
<big>John G. Robers, Jr. hates your rights, the rights of toads, and the rights of mountain tops.</big>
I'm just going to copy and paste now because I don't want my own opinions to muddle this. Voila:
***Roberts was the lead council in Lujan v. National Wildlife Federation. The government's position in this case was that private citizens could not sue the government over violations of environmental regulations. While in private practice, Roberts filed an amicus brief arguing for the allowance of "mountaintop removal" for coal mining in West Virginia.
***Roberts wrote a dissenting opinion in Rancho Viejo, LLC v. Gale A. Norton siding with a developer in a case involving the protection of a rare Californian toad under the Endangered Species Act. He argued that the interstate commerce clause of the Constitution did not permit the government to regulate activity affecting what he called "a hapless toad" that "for reasons of its own lives its entire life in California."
***Roberts favors religion in schools, co-writing an amicus brief to the Supreme Court in which he argued that religious ceremonies should be allowed during high school graduations.
***Roberts was part of the effort to remove certain parts of the Voting Rights Act and then prevent legislation against the Supreme Court's decision about the issue.
***Roberts represented Toyota Motor Manufacturing in a case regarding the Americans with Disabilities Act, in which Toyota argues that carpal tunnel syndrome does not make an employee disabled.
***Roberts defended the validity of a government regulation that banned the mentioning of abortion as an option available to pregnant women seeking help from federally-funded family planning programs:
"We continue to believe that [Roe v. Wade] was wrongly decided and should be overruled."
<b>HOWEVER</b>
In 2003, during his confirmation hearing for appointment to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit, Roberts responded to a senator's question about Roe v. Wade: "<b>Roe v. Wade is the settled law of the land...There is nothing in my personal views that would prevent me from fully and faithfully applying that precedent</b>." He said that his previous statement in 1990 was his client's position, not his own.
***Roberts joined the majority in upholding military tribunals set up by the Bush administration for trying terrorism suspects, overturning the district court ruling.
***The D.C. Circuit case Hedgepeth v. Washington Metro Authority involved a twelve-year-old girl who was invited to incriminate herself as an illegal drug user, taken into custody, handcuffed, driven to police headquarters and booked (fingerprinted) because she ate a french fry in a Washington metro station. Roberts wrote for a 3-0 panel affirming a district court decision that dismissed the girl's complaint. (NOTE FROM TOM: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL THIS ONE MEANS.
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Conclusion? Skip the Supreme Court; Judge John G. Roberts, Jr. for president!
Comments? Comment now. If you were a senator, what would YOU do?! Come one. Let's do some Senatorial RP!!