Losing weight really fast

[BeastDad1987]

My second topic today. I feel so daring.

I need to become thinner in about a week. I have a modeling/photo shoot coming up next Saturday that came about unexpectedly, and I'm not prepared. I'm either thinking of lessening the food I eat overall or cutting out carbs and sugar completely in addition to exercise. After the shoot is over, I'll ease into a regular (fattening) diet again, as generally I'm not too concerned about my appearance but this is a request. I actually was supposed to do one before, but no one could get a hold of me for some reason.

Yeah. Which is better? Or is there an easier way?

[Vile]

Uchan, the rich artist model.

Excuse me while I go scream in my closet for a few hours.

Upon my return, I will tell you to focus your diet around vegetables, water, fruit, and wholegrains. Cardio for a half an hour every day.

[Linzoy]

I think the fedral thing reccomends about an hour of excersize to lose weight, not a half hours.

Losing 5 pounds in a week is easy, keeping it up is more difficult. As long as you're hungry all the time it should work. Not starving, just hungry.

The slimfast diet works pretty well and quickly, but you have to stick with it. Right after you drink it you'll feel fine, then you'll start to feel extremely hungry about an hour before you're supposed to eat. That's what happened to me anyway. I lost about 15-20 pounds on that diet before I gave up.

[Shaman King]

Meth.

[BeastDad1987]

Vile, you're much prettier than me. I'm sure you could land a good modeling job if you looked for one. This one came about because the convention/booth model thing, so it was pure luck.

I'll look into the Slimfast diet. I really just need to lose the weight for this week, and after that, I will resume my diet of weird Japanese foods and sugar.

[brokensirunit]

heroin lots of heroin

[robot]

i'll diet with you

apparently i'm pudgy

:(

[Shaman King]

I already suggested drugs.

Besides, stimulants are much better at increasing your metabolism AND suppressing your appetite than narcotics. Good job stealing my joke AND making less sense.

[brokensirunit]

ahh but heroin creates a dependency on the drug where nothing else will satisfy but heroin, thus they will have nothing but heroin until they die or go into rehab either way you will lose quite a bit of weight

[Forever Finite]

linzoy, it's almost impossible to lose 5 pounds in a week. if anything, it's mostly water weight. 2.5 to 3 pounds is pretty much the maximum within a healthy range. any more and you'd only be drinking juice or water for a week.

however, uchan, if you're looking for TEMPORARY weight loss, losing water weight actually works. avoid salty things, carry a bottle of water with you everywhere and eat as few starches (breads, pasta, apples, bananas, etc.) as you can bear.

pretty much, eat small meals four or five times a day of mostly small things that leave you feeling hungrier than when you ate them. :(

P.S. i GUARANTEE that it will work twice as well if you do one or two hours of heavy exertion a day. if you have a gym or a bike, go for that while you listen to music and you're good to go. helps shut your digestive system up for a while.

[BeastDad1987]

Does drinking water instead of most anything else help? I heard it does, but I'm not sure. I heard that supposedly, your body absorbs the nutrients it needs, and you piss out the rest along with bad junk in your system. I don't drink water or milk or anything, mostly mugicha (barley tea). Well, I guess that's mostly water anyways, but I kinda assumed it was better than water. Plus it's yummy.

I don't have a bike, and there's no gym nearby (well, I think there's a Curves), but I have a treadmill. Maybe I can jog for an hour on that noisy thing.

[reef]

i'll diet with you

apparently i'm pudgy

:(
robot no it's a good pudge

it's a pudge i would invite over for dinner and secretly give a handjob to during dinner with my parents

[Forever Finite]

Does drinking water instead of most anything else help? I heard it does, but I'm not sure. I heard that supposedly, your body absorbs the nutrients it needs, and you piss out the rest along with bad junk in your system. I don't drink water or milk or anything, mostly mugicha (barley tea). Well, I guess that's mostly water anyways, but I kinda assumed it was better than water. Plus it's yummy.

I don't have a bike, and there's no gym nearby (well, I think there's a Curves), but I have a treadmill. Maybe I can jog for an hour on that noisy thing.
tea is really good, too. most teas act as a mild laxative (which can be good. we're not talking CHOCO-LAX or anything.).

if you find that the treadmill is too high-impact and your joints get tired too soon, you can do a bunch of floor exercizes. pilates is way over-rated, but it has a good rep for a reason. you can find various pilates workouts on the web and do them while you watch a movie or read a book (you can do that with almost anything, though.).

[BeastDad1987]

Yeah, my mom has almost no fat whatsoever (it's kinda creepy actually) and is mostly muscle and bone, and she basically just eats well and does yoga every other day. I figure I'll be doing some yoga as well, and spend some time on the treadmill.

[~V+]

hmm, small meals and water?



Shit, looks like im losing a ton of weight.

I drink alot of water anyways, but I usually eat until im not hungry.

[reef]

hmm, small meals and water?



Shit, looks like im losing a ton of weight.

I drink alot of water anyways, but I usually eat until im not hungry.
fatass

[~V+]

FUCK YOU REEF, AT LEAST IM WANTED BY MEN AND WOMEN


MOSTLY MEN THOUGH


AND ALOT OF THEM ARE AT 4CHAN







AND AT LEAST IVE HAD SEX

[reef]

dude you are very harsh

man

:(

[Forever Finite]

but reef is like the male version of the virgin mary. he transcends us all with his purity and light.

[reef]

i got a handjob one though

did

did the virgin mary get a handjob

[~V+]

did you see the threads today reef?



most of the replies were

"leash"

"tie you down"

"I want to stick my cock in your ass"

"will you sleep with me"



I got caught up in all the attention.

[reef]

man what a prude

[reef]

did you see the threads today reef?



most of the replies were

"leash"

"tie you down"

"I want to stick my cock in your ass"

"will you sleep with me"



I got caught up in all the attention.
i was too busy watching cartoon network and waiting for foster's to come on to be on zee internet

[~V+]

I love fosters.




I feel like a nerd.




but fuck you guys that show is rad.

[Forever Finite]

but edward vee, takker and vile will have sex with telephone poles (to relieve vile's unfortunate YI).

[~V+]

takker is just a dirty pervert.


I would like to have sex with vile though







shes hot.











fuck all of you

[reef]

I love fosters.




I feel like a nerd.




but fuck you guys that show is rad.
seriously it is and i will kill anyone who says different

[~V+]

reef, why are you washing your hands


SUSPICIOUS


reef why are you cutting your food


SUSPICIOUS


reef why are you masturbating in the shower


SUSPICIOUS

[Takker]

takker is just a dirty pervert.


I would like to have sex with vile though







shes hot.











fuck all of youIS THIS HOW YOU TRULY FEEL? DEEP DOWN? :( because that makes me sad...

[reef]

dude you didn't drag it out

it's

SUUUUUSSSSPIIIIIIICIIIOOOUUSSSSS

[~V+]

no you need to roll your eyes too


so its


SUSPIIICIIOUUUUUSS


/cameraflash

[reef]

i would probably do takker if she were of age

WHAT AM I SAYING!

[Takker]

:takker?!:

[reef]

let's bloo this!

ugh that was horrible

[~V+]

takker isnt of age
WHOA THERE

[reef]

:takker?!:
sry

[Takker]

sry
its ok reef. lets go get some pizza. AND V CAN'T HAVE ANY :mad:

[~V+]

TAKKER

BABE


IM SORRY









I AM SHOTA 4 U


THAT MEANS IM UNDERAGED IN JAPANESE I THINK

[Takker]

you are underaged for me? <i>oh the possibilities</i>

but I still do not forgive you. you toy with my emotions, and I am a fragile individual.

[~V+]

FINE



THEN YOU GET NONE OF THIS


http://www.donandmikewebsite.com/content_images/TCS%20-%20When%20Did%20THIS%20Happen1.jpg





FUCK WRONG IMAGE




http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y108/aircraftdamage/ericp.jpg

[Takker]

oh god, what have I done?!

[Awesome McManly]

Hey finite, my weight can fluctuate up to like 8 or 9 pounds in a week.

Am I going to die?

[~V+]

actually, jt, probably.

I think its called diabetes.

[implode]

Am I going to die? yeah. sorry i had to be the one to tell you.

everything i would have said has already been covered by rachel, so i can only reiterate what i believe to be the important points: drink <i>uncanny</i> amounts of water. having to pee every 45 minutes or so is simply the price you pay for beauty. and if you can, limit your consumption to either one reasonable meal or three or four little birdie servings per-day. if your lifestyle is basically sedentary, try to get up and move around a little more this week. spend more time on your feet than you normally would. the goal here is to burn almost as many calories as you take in, which, if done correctly and coupled with the water, can drop up to five pounds in a week. don't listen to rachel - she only knows what she's talking about.

it's all about limitation. you can't derive any pleasure from eating, this week. just keep focused on the goal, and you'll almost certainly see <i>some</i> sort of result.

<small>though, they want you as a model just the way you are. and i don't blame them. even if you don't lose any weight, you'll still be a <i>more than</i> deserving candidate for the job.</small>

[Forever Finite]

Hey finite, my weight can fluctuate up to like 8 or 9 pounds in a week.

Am I going to die?
women on their periods can fluctuate as much as 11 pounds in a few days. it all has to do with water retention. believe me, there is no way you are losing and gaining 8 or 9 pounds of actual lipids in just a week.

[Linzoy]

Water weight is still weight. Dehydrating yourself is a good way to lose weight, not exactly healthy though.

[implode]

it helps (i'm still going on about my original post, here) if the water you drink is outrageously cold, too. in my theory of calorie annihilation, anyway. i reason that if a calorie is the amount of heat it takes to heat up water one degree, if the water that you're heating up is ice cold, it will take more calories to heat it up to the appropriate temperature.

rachel? is my idea unfounded? i've never actually... checked, and i don't trust myself to use a search engine without getting lost in a portal of evil and forgetting my original intentions.

[Davey Rootbeer]

er...

why not just drink tea, then?

that way, you still get your antioxidants, and you'll lose the water weight.

I had quite a few friends on the wrestling team back in high school, and when theyy weighed you to determine which class you'd be in, a lot of people did crazy stuff in order to lose weight fast, i remeber one kid going to the bathroom before the weigh-in and coming back with like, vomit crusted over his mouth, and another one who took a couple of Stackers the night before and was up going to the bathroom all night.

it's totaslly fucked up that the coaches never said/did anything about it. (of course, they WANTED it to happen so that their kids would be the heaviest (and strongest) in that particular weight class)



But tea is good. iced tea, even.

[implode]

i use coffee. and collapse on the floor like terry schiavo.

<small>that story really scared me.</small>

[AngryGoatFace]

ahh but heroin creates a dependency on the drug where nothing else will satisfy but heroin, thus they will have nothing but heroin until they die or go into rehab either way you will lose quite a bit of weight
<font face="trebuchet MS">this noobie seems quite like me, i will take him under my arm.</font>

[implode]

HI ERIC

[Davey Rootbeer]

hey there, Eric.

< /something about the body maintaining homeostasis at approximately 98.5 degrees>

[homeostasis]

it helps (i'm still going on about my original post, here) if the water you drink is outrageously cold, too. in my theory of calorie annihilation, anyway. i reason that if a calorie is the amount of heat it takes to heat up water one degree, if the water that you're heating up is ice cold, it will take more calories to heat it up to the appropriate temperature.

rachel? is my idea unfounded? i've never actually... checked, and i don't trust myself to use a search engine without getting lost in a portal of evil and forgetting my original intentions.
Yes Coryy you are correct.

Now go eat a pizza.

[Davey Rootbeer]

Speaking of maintaining Homeostasis...

[homeostasis]

Boooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[!~Melissa~!]

FUCK YOU REEF, AT LEAST IM WANTED BY MEN AND WOMEN


MOSTLY MEN THOUGH


AND ALOT OF THEM ARE AT 4CHAN


Haha, 4chan rules. I went to a panel for it at Otakon, and there were lots of scary, sweaty old guys. oo; I feel for you...

[BeastDad1987]

I want pics too.

I exercised last night for like... 10 minutes. Then I got really tired, and it was mostly stretching. Today I ate a little sausage, tomato, onion, and egg for breakfast (about three bites total), and a small salad for lunch. I'm so hungry and when we went to Blockbuster I saw all the candy, soda, and popcorn, I got really sad. It's the first day and I'm having a hard time, booo.

Grrrr.

[!~Melissa~!]

xD I asked moot if I could glomp him and he said no. ;_; OMG, he was so adorable! His armpits were covered, so I couldn't get any hair, not that I'd want to. oO; Unfortunately, I didn't have a camera.

[exemplary citizen]

<i>You're</i> the moot glomper?


Woah.


hey. "kuroneko ami" here. prolly don't remember me from before, but heya.

[~V+]

xD I asked moot if I could glomp him and he said no. ;_; OMG, he was so adorable! His armpits were covered, so I couldn't get any hair, not that I'd want to. oO; Unfortunately, I didn't have a camera.
THAT WASNT MOOT, MOOT IS MEXICAN, THAT GUY WAS WHITE, HE ISNT MOOT.

[!~Melissa~!]

<i>You're</i> the moot glomper?


Woah.


hey. "kuroneko ami" here. prolly don't remember me from before, but heya.

You saw me!?! Cool! xD Yesh, I'm the hyper chick dressed as Envy who wanted to glomp teh mootness.

Actually, I *do* remember you!

[Forever Finite]

YES, cory you would be correct. but the calorie burnage is almost insignificant. drinking ice cold water is kind of a jerk thing to do to your digestive system when it's already aggrivated, though. it tends to shut down even more.

I want pics too.

I exercised last night for like... 10 minutes. Then I got really tired, and it was mostly stretching. Today I ate a little sausage, tomato, onion, and egg for breakfast (about three bites total), and a small salad for lunch. I'm so hungry and when we went to Blockbuster I saw all the candy, soda, and popcorn, I got really sad. It's the first day and I'm having a hard time, booo.

Grrrr.
it gets easier around day three, when your stomach shrinks.


god help me i'm giving out sick advice.

[~V+]

IT IS NOT MOOT YOU DUMB MOTHERFUCKER.

[BeastDad1987]

it gets easier around day three, when your stomach shrinks.


god help me i'm giving out sick advice.
I certainly hope so. I ate another small salad (spinach w/ vinegar/olive oil/red wine/garlic) and I feel hungrier that before I ate it. I walked about a mile on the treadmill and I feel awful.

[Forever Finite]

if you find yourself uncontrollably hungry for a feeling of "being full", you can eat a big bowl of lettuce with salt and vinegar (i suggest balsamic) on it, but don't use olive oil.

[BeastDad1987]

Okee dokee. Will do.

[Vile]

Or, instead, you can crush ice in a blender, put some dye in it and enjoy a nice filling "slushy".

[Takker]

like a snowcone that has lost all its flavoring and the juice sinks to the bottom and it breaks through the cup that it's in and it gets all over your pants and never comes off.

[Vile]

I'm into dancing now. Seriously, I've lost maybe two pounds while eating three meals a day by just rocking out at night to whatever's on the radio.

Or trampolines! God damn. You trampoline four times a week for an hour and you're set.

But I can only trampoline at night because my skin burns in the direct sun. :( Usually 12:00 to 1:00 AM

[BeastDad1987]

I wish we had a trampoline. That'd kick so much ass.

I can eat tofu, right? A lot of it? I can live off tofu for a week no problem. I usually add soy sauce and bonito fish flakes. Will the sodium in the soy sauce ruin everything?

[Forever Finite]

tofu's very dense.

[~V+]

ps guys I go on my deit tomorrow

I'll beat you all.

I hope.


:(


I want to be like, heroin addict thin.
then I can be like


"CHECK OUT MY DRUG INDUCED ABS"

[Vile]

I'll drink to that.

[~V+]

ps guys I go on my deit tomorrow

I'll beat you all.

I hope.


:(


I want to be like, heroin addict thin.
then I can be like


"CHECK OUT MY DRUG INDUCED ABS"

[Vile]

I'll drink to that.

[exemplary citizen]

Okay, did you just intentionally double post that, Vile, or do we need to be worrying about the database crashing again?

[~V+]

database, mucho.

[exemplary citizen]

Well, shit.

Somebody should back that up and check the tables again.

[Meat Load]

I'll drink to that.

[~V+]

Well, shit.

Somebody should back that up and check the tables again.

[Vile]

have no fear, it was all in the name of a good laugh.