View Full Version : Genpets, wave of the future!
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 03:33 PM
Hello I am a new member to this fan message board of my favorite TV show. I will show up from time to time, as most of my business is on a different message board known as MekTek.net. I hope to enjoy my stay here (as long as you cooperate :p) since most of you are fellow fans :) .
As my first post on this message board I will post what the end result is of genetic engineering and manufacturing:
Genpets!!!! (http://www.genpets.com/index.php)
So, what, these are like those things that get huge and spongy when you soak them in water?
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 03:45 PM
You are mistaken, if you looked more closely you could see what these are.
However, this is merely a hoax, a hoax that is designed to show what could happen if genetic experiments go to far, shurley you must see this.
implode
08-09-2006, 03:47 PM
think of all the factory abortions!
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 03:50 PM
abortions? These where genetically engineered, not naturally made. How could there be any?
implode
08-09-2006, 03:52 PM
a hoax that is designed to show what could happen if genetic experiments go to far oh, whatever. it's a hoax designed to fool people, just like every other hoax. that's like advertising exploding pies to show society what could happen <i>when pies go too far.</i> it's obvious that no one would ever actually do this, but it's shocking enough to make people think about how many other people are in charge that are more fucked-up morally than they are. all this does is breed distrust in your fellow man.
implode
08-09-2006, 03:53 PM
abortions? These where genetically engineered, not naturally made. How could there be any? if you're in the process of creating life (or anything, really), whether genetically or not, and there are impurities that make the outcome dispensible, then you abort the process.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 03:55 PM
oh, whatever. it's a hoax designed to fool people, just like every other hoax.
This is a quote form the creator;
"I'm not against bioengineering, I'm simply hesitant towards where and how and by whom the technology will be used. That's what this art sums up. I don't ever want to be confused for as a crazy activist, nor do I want to appear as endorsing this technology. Bioengineering could lead to medical breakthroughs that save lives, but will it? This is more a critique of corporate ethics than of technological ethics. "
Quoted from http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/genpets.asp
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 03:56 PM
if you're in the process of creating life (or anything, really), whether genetically or not, and there are impurities that make the outcome dispensible, then you abort the process.
That's true.
implode
08-09-2006, 03:58 PM
yes, that's proving my point.
This is more a critique of corporate ethics than of technological ethics. see? the only point he's making is "don't trust the people in charge."
implode
08-09-2006, 04:00 PM
btw, i don't mean to sound rude - it was a good hoax and certainly the most interesting thing i've seen today, but it's not a critique of bioengineering's dark side. just another fuck-the-CEO punk rock song.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:02 PM
So who else would actually like to get these things?
implode
08-09-2006, 04:03 PM
couldn't you just have a baby and rip its vocal chords out? you could feed it with a tube while you went on vacation and shit.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:06 PM
Fuck, man, you gotta wait nine months for a baby.
I'm down with six-to-eight-weeks for shipping.
So who else would actually like to get these things?
They're kinda nasty looking. Make 'em pink, furry, and able to memorize simple phrases for my amusement, and then we'd have something. But even then, I'd rather have a hovercar like in Back to the Future.
Fuck, man, you gotta wait nine months for a baby.
I'm down with six-to-eight-weeks for shipping.
Oh man, awesome marketing idea: a baby you grow in a little tank in like 3 weeks, like those stalactite things you always see in museum gift shops. Instead of living on as a person, though, it just sort of dies and turns into pink watery pulp. Just pour it down the sink when you're done!
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 04:07 PM
couldn't you just have a baby and rip its vocal chords out? you could feed it with a tube while you went on vacation and shit.
But a baby isn't weird enough, plus that would land you prison.
implode
08-09-2006, 04:08 PM
Fuck, man, you gotta wait nine months for a baby.
I'm down with six-to-eight-weeks for shipping. yeah, but paying with your credit card isn't nearly as satisfying as paying with your wang express.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:09 PM
But a baby isn't weird enough, plus that would land you prison.
Not if you lived in deep Mexico or something.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 04:10 PM
yeah, but paying with your credit card isn't nearly as satisfying as paying with your wang express.
A baby still isn't weird enough
implode
08-09-2006, 04:11 PM
But a baby isn't weird enough, plus that would land you prison. having a baby on your dresser with an IV in its arm and a bloody scab on its throat <i>isn't weird enough</i>?
the other point is true, though. we'd have to come up with all sorts of absurd laws for bioengineered retail products. when one of them died you'd probably have to call up a special biomortality service that very respectfully put them in shoeboxes and tossed them in the dumpster.
implode
08-09-2006, 04:12 PM
Not if you lived in deep Mexico or something. man what is with you and this prejudice against deep mexican chicks? i've heard just about all i can take, my good sir.
A baby still isn't weird enough
A baby that is maintained by a series of external PVC tubing isn't weird? Then, pray tell, what the hell is "weird" enough for ya??
edit: Fuck it, cory was quicker on the draw on that one. I would still like to hear your awesome weird idea, though.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:13 PM
man what is with you and this prejudice against deep mexican chicks? i've heard just about all i can take, my good sir.
I got nothing on the chicks, I'm just saying the policía isn't as good down there. A tube-baby could go quite unnoticed if you pick your location right.
implode
08-09-2006, 04:14 PM
s'what i'm sayin. i think we'd have to coat the baby in saran wrap and replace one of his legs with a celery stalk, or something.
s'what i'm sayin. i think we'd have to coat the baby in saran wrap and replace one of his legs with a celery stalk, or something.
Or maybe, it could be genetically engineered to be born with like tattoos or something. Or it could have vegetable oil for sweat. Man, we should totally mail all our awesome genetic-baby-pet ideas to Mattel or someone.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:18 PM
Or maybe, it could be genetically engineered to be born with like tattoos or something. Or it could have vegetable oil for sweat. Man, we should totally mail all our awesome genetic-baby-pet ideas to Mattel or someone.
Why don't we go the extra mile and make the babies produce something useful, like hard liquor?
implode
08-09-2006, 04:19 PM
let's engineer it to feed on embryonic fluid at first, and then human flesh, so instead of being birthed, it can just eat its way out of its host... er, mommy. let's see how many chicks dare to complain about their contractions after THAT.
we should consult mathieu, first - i'm pretty sure he was a bioengineered baby at some point.
let's engineer it to feed on embryonic fluid at first, and then human flesh, so instead of being birthed, it can just eat its way out of its host... er, mommy. let's see how many chicks dare to complain about their contractions after THAT.
we should consult mathieu, first - i'm pretty sure he was a bioengineered baby at some point.
Maybe they could just engineer some kind of flesh-package to ship the babies in. Like a giant pizza-pocket shaped meat chamber that just sort of sprouts a baby by the time it gets to your doorstep. Maybe you could add water or something?
And if Mathieu wasn't a genetic baby, I'm sure he was trying his hand a growing them in between his surfing championship and his cattle drive.
Why don't we go the extra mile and make the babies produce something useful, like hard liquor?
Marty, you're not thinking 4th dimensionally. If the baby secreted oil, you could slide it around the room like a hockey puck. Plus, it'd be easy to remove from it's tube chamber whenever it needed to be relocated, or thrown away. Whatever.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:30 PM
Hey, I'm talking about pissing the juice, not sweating. Oil's just fine with me.
implode
08-09-2006, 04:33 PM
what if we engineered HALF babies, that were fully functional and shit except for the fact that there was only one half of them, and pitted them against OTHER half babies in some sort of televised halfbaby deathmatch? science would get the knowhow, we would get the entertainment, and the lucky one baby that rose to the top of the ranks would "win" the other half of their body! WHAT downsides?
dude. i would watch that. fuck, i would buy a portable DVD player and bring that shit everywhere with me.
MST3Kakalina
08-09-2006, 04:38 PM
man this is retarded.
thanks for making this thread go from sucky to entertaining, keith-cory.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:38 PM
So, are we talking vertical halves? Like, from the waist up? Some organs might be neccessary to keep the little bastards alive, so maybe we can cut out the pelvis and call it "half?" And how could we be sure that they would be trained enough to fight other halfbabys before they were no longer babies but instead halfchilds?
Not to say I don't 100% support the idea, I just think we need to iron out some of the problems before we start making decisions.
Yeah, but half-baby technology is so far down the pipeline you'd have no choice but to watch it on Blu-ray.
Would the halves be divided vertically or horozontally? 'Cause, like... if we found a way to split their brains in half, we could have SOME baby halves that could see color and the other half would be really good at math and shit. Oheriwse, I guess if the babies could walk we could take the top half of the baby and give it treads, and the bottom half could stalk around with some kind of tiny anti-aircraft gun mounted to it. But hey.... can these baby parts do all that, or just crawl around and stuff? OH: RC Babies. It's be like Battlebots, except with babies and it'd be interesting.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 04:44 PM
What would be really interesting is if we made vert-baby-halfs, but gave each half a brain and two senses. Each HB would have the sense of touch, but leg halves would have ears and super-hearing or something to make it kind of fair, and top halves would have eyes but no ears.
implode
08-09-2006, 05:07 PM
Yeah, but half-baby technology is so far down the pipeline you'd have no choice but to watch it on Blu-ray.
Would the halves be divided vertically or horozontally? 'Cause, like... if we found a way to split their brains in half, we could have SOME baby halves that could see color and the other half would be really good at math and shit. Oheriwse, I guess if the babies could walk we could take the top half of the baby and give it treads, and the bottom half could stalk around with some kind of tiny anti-aircraft gun mounted to it. But hey.... can these baby parts do all that, or just crawl around and stuff? OH: RC Babies. It's be like Battlebots, except with babies and it'd be interesting. i think they'd have to be split vertically - horizontally wouldn't be fair, the bottom halves would just kick the immobile top halves to death. but with vertical splittage, they could just maim the shit out of each other on their sides.
we cannot be giving them treads and guns - that won't be a pure competition, anymore, it'll just be more entertainment based on blwoing each other up. this has to be PURE competition, here - the most vicious vertical baby half wins. kind of like rocky. fuck, EXACTLY like rocky.
What would be really interesting is if we made vert-baby-halfs, but gave each half a brain and two senses. Each HB would have the sense of touch, but leg halves would have ears and super-hearing or something to make it kind of fair, and top halves would have eyes but no ears. see, this is fair and reasonable, since we're only manipulating their senses, not adding extra parts to them. i'd see no problem with giving one half super hearing and one half keen eyesight - it'd be a good litmus test for what would be good to start cosmetically adding to humans, assuming that those human would one day have to fight a homicidal half of a baby unexpectedly. which, of course, is reasonable.
implode
08-09-2006, 05:09 PM
And how could we be sure that they would be trained enough to fight other halfbabys before they were no longer babies but instead halfchilds? that's simple - just put one bowl of food in front of two of them, ring a bell, and adminster an electric shock whenever one of them is willing to share. eventually, the instinct to fight will develop and simply ringing a bell will trigger a halfbaby rampage.
Also, we could genetically engineer them to be nicotine addicts, to stunt their growth. Plus, think of how much more lucrative this gets when every tobacco company in the world is vying to get their company logo twtooed on the hal a baby head belonging to the world's most vicious baby half. Shit, we'll be BILLIONAIRES.
Also, if this is to be exactly like Rocky, am I to assume there will be a training montage?
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 05:26 PM
Now that's what is weird:
Man being able to create a life form and make money off of it.
The gift of life as we know it just another monopoly, Pathetic
The gift of life as we know it, just another monopoly.
Well, I'm sure we'd also be able to use life as we know it to make like a really really fast Playstation. But, then, that's not exactly life "as we know it", is it?
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 05:34 PM
Man, that shit better not cost $600.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 05:34 PM
Well, I'm sure we'd also be able to use life as we know it to make like a really really fast Playstation. But, then, that's not exactly life "as we know it", is it?
Nope, unless your a brain in a tank somewhere tricked all your life into believing the events of this world by some insane computer.
implode
08-09-2006, 05:44 PM
Now that's what is weird:
Man being able to create a life form and make money off of it.
The gift of life as we know it just another monopoly, Pathetic what's pathetic? it hasn't happened yet. you're getting all worked up over exploding pies, again.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 05:58 PM
Nope, unless your a brain in a tank somewhere tricked all your life into believing the events of this world by some insane computer.
Care to explain this? I've re-read it 5 times and I have no clue about what you mean to convey.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 06:07 PM
Care to explain this? I've re-read it 5 times and I have no clue about what you mean to convey.
That could be life as we know it, duh.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 06:14 PM
what's pathetic? it hasn't happened yet.
Its the idea, i know it hasn't happenend yet.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 06:18 PM
See, the thing is that computers can't be insane.
Dr. Badman
08-09-2006, 06:19 PM
http://www.genpets.com/media/photo17m.jpg
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 06:21 PM
See, the thing is that computers can't be insane.
Never Mind, you just don't get it.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 06:22 PM
Precisely. There never was a mind.
thisisentchris8
08-09-2006, 06:23 PM
Precisely. There never was a mind.
And hopefully there never will.
Forever Finite
08-09-2006, 06:23 PM
the genpet doesn't suit my needs, how much for the boy in the ad?
What ever would you do with a McCauly Culkin lookalike? Rachel, I like you and all but I may have no choice but to kill you if you're planning on setting loose another Home Alone sequel on an unsuspecting world.
Forever Finite
08-09-2006, 06:56 PM
a girl can dream, keith.
<I>a girl can certainly dream</i>.
Charnye West
08-09-2006, 07:17 PM
Screw halfbabys, we could make a lot more off of MiniMacauleys.
Young Jeff Bridges
08-09-2006, 09:21 PM
WHAT? a hoax? all my dreams of owning millions of genpets washed down the drain! how will i push my seed?
Meat Load
08-09-2006, 09:24 PM
i don't want one of those fucking ugly-ass things running around my house
genpets.com fails
Dr. Badman
08-09-2006, 09:42 PM
I just noticed the thumbs-up kid has a slight twitch in his eye.
He's either faking that he likes his creepy present, not wanting to disappoint the giver - or he's thinking of all the horrible things he can do to it...
Meat Load
08-09-2006, 09:44 PM
also, kids don't thumbs-up anything these days unless they're extremely unhip
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